Internet commentators rallied behind a man who explained why he refuses to babysit his older sister’s three children.
In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITeA**hole, Redditor u/petty_brother (aka the original poster or OP) said he recently returned to his hometown and was immediately inundated with childcare requests, until one heated interaction took place It is clear that this would never happen.
Captioned: “[Am I the a**hole] for refusing to babysit my kibbles?” The post received nearly 7,000 upvotes and 700 comments in the last day.
“I (32 million) have no children,” OP began. “Not because of childhood trauma or because I think the earth is overpopulated…[I] I don’t want to invest my time and energy in raising them.”
He went on to explain that he has a 35-year-old sister and a 28-year-old brother, and said on the original poster that he left home when he was 19 and was therefore never asked to babysit his eldest sibling’s three children. Instead, that responsibility fell on the younger brother of the original poster.
“My older sister tends to dump her kids on anyone she can suck,” the OP wrote. “For years my brother has been calling to get angry at her for just dropping her kids off her doorstep and leaving.”
“I moved back 3 months ago and from the start she wanted me to set up a room for her kids in my house,” OP continued. “I silenced her hard. I also told her I won’t babysit her kids unless it’s a real emergency…she thought I was bluffing.”
“She fell over the first time [by] unannounced to leave their children, I did not open the door…[and] said all that will do is [get] called the police [her] because of abandonment,” OP added. “Now she calls me an asshole… my younger brother is also mad at me for not helping him lighten his load [but] I told him it’s not my fault that he doesn’t know how to set boundaries.”
Before the outbreak of COVID-19, data released by the National Center for Education Statistics showed that nearly 40 percent of children in the United States were cared for by a non-parental relative at least once a week.
But with more than 9,000 daycare closures and skyrocketing rates across the country from December 2019 to March 2021, Care.com reports that a much larger number of parents are now concerned about finding reliable, affordable childcare and are turning to family members Has.
Despite the argument that family members are better equipped to babysit than any other option, relying on relatives for childcare is risky.
From lofty expectations to compensation issues and the potential for existing tensions to spill over, parenting website Family Education reports that relative childcare isn’t as big a deal as it seems on the surface.
“The key to a successful childcare partnership with a family member is good communication,” the website reads. “You must be able to discuss issues honestly and openly with your relative/potential carer.
“If not,” it continues. “Your child… will probably be better off if you arrange alternative day care.”
On numerous occasions during the viral Reddit post, the original poster reiterated that he was being brutally honest with his sister for not babysitting her children. Unfortunately, he was ignored and a threat to call the police was necessary to rectify the situation.
Redditors who responded to the viral post confirmed that honesty, calling out both the original poster’s sister and brother as they tried to back him into a corner over their inability to deliver on their respective goals of the deal to comply with
“[Not the a**hole]” wrote Redditor u/stinstin555 in the top comment of the post, which received almost 10,000 upvotes. “Not your children, so NOT your problem.
“She has decided to have children. It is YOUR responsibility to take care of them,” they continued. “It’s also HER responsibility to find and pay for childcare if she wants a break.”
“And little brother needs to follow OP’s example and grow a friggin’ backbone,” added Redditor u/Interesting-End1710, receiving more than 3,000 upvotes. “[He] hates that she does this but lets her get away with it.”
Redditor u/MagixTurtle, whose comment received more than 2,000 upvotes, echoed this opinion.
“[Not the a**hole]”, write. “You just have clear boundaries and your brother lets your sister trample on him. It’s his fault, not yours.”
“Your brother needs to read this thread, get his way, and repeat what you told her,” Redditor u/Kris82868 chimed in, receiving more than 1,500 upvotes.
news week asked u/petty_brother for a comment.
https://www.newsweek.com/man-backed-never-babysitting-sisters-kids-shut-her-down-hard-1736326 Husband supports because he never looks after his sister’s children: “Shut Her Down Hard”